A Conversation With Elizabeth Hawksworth on Overweight Nannies

September 12, 2013

by Michelle LaRowe
Editor in Chief

Recently I came across an interesting series of blog posts addressing a topic discussed quietly amongst circles of nannies: overweight caregivers. It shouldn’t be surprising that a fair amount of nannies are overweight or obese; a fair amount of the general population is too. But more interesting is a recent study that showed that 55% of nurses are overweight or obese, citing job stress and long work hours as two of the major causes.

Wanting to learn more about the author, the reason behind her passion and her thoughts on the topic, I reached out to her. Here’s a little bit of how our exchange went.

eNannySource: Why do you think some nannies struggle with being overweight?

Elizabeth: I believe that many nannies are overweight because there’s a fair amount of people who are overweight in this world. There are studies to show that the food we eat and the lives we lead contribute to obesity, but there are also studies that show that many people are overweight because of genetics and pre-existing conditions.

eNannySource: What do you think are some common misconceptions about overweight nannies?

Elizabeth: I feel that the misconceptions about overweight nannies fall into the misconceptions about fat people everywhere: they’re lazy, they don’t model good eating habits and they won’t be able to keep up with the physical demands of chasing after children. As is proven by the many nannies I know and have had the privilege of talking to, these misconceptions are definitely false. I feel most people who felt they couldn’t stand up to the job of nannying wouldn’t attempt to do it. I also feel that many overweight people do eat good diets and do model “nutritious” eating and behavior. And certainly, if you’re looking after children, you most definitely are not lazy!

eNannySource: Do you think being overweight has prevented you from landing a job?

Elizabeth:  I do feel that being overweight has stopped some parents from hiring me, because of the aforementioned misconceptions, and because of some people’s natural prejudice towards fat people. Some parents feel that their nanny represents the family and must look a certain way. Others make snap judgments without giving an overweight nanny a chance. I have definitely seen parents shut down on me when they first meet me in person. I think it’s unfair, which is why I do my best to fight against society’s fatphobia and prejudice by writing about it on my blog and in other places.

eNannySource: What advice do you have for overweight nannies during the job search?

Elizabeth: What’s worked for me is being honest. I don’t agree with disclosing personal medical information, but I’m willing to show parents that I can keep up with the demands of the job by offering a short trial period for free so that they can observe my work. I also make up a sample “nanny day” menu for the children so that they can see that I’m knowledgeable about child nutrition and development. If they make snap judgments about me, I tell myself I wouldn’t have fit in with that family anyway, and that it’s for the best. I refuse to take it personally. I have always found families that respect me as a person and as a nanny. Not everyone will be judgmental.

eNannySource: As a role model to the children, how do you advocate healthy eating?

Elizabeth: Food, to me, has been a subject fraught with stress and worry. Growing up as a thin child and then “filling out” in my teens and early 20s, I used food as a way to combat stress and feel better. This is not something I want the children in my care to do. I make healthy snacks and meals for the children in my care. I let them see me eating fruits and vegetables. We talk about how food provides the building blocks to growing up strong and healthy. I talk to them about finding trusted adults to talk to about their own worries and stress, and I try to be a person that they can speak to. I follow parents’ leads when it comes to food and healthy eating, as well. What’s most important, though, is that I tell kids in my care (of course, with parents’ blessing) that it’s okay to have treats like soda or McDonald’s sometimes. It’s just not healthy to eat those things all the time.

eNannySource: What do you have to say to parents who are concerned about hiring an overweight nanny?

Elizabeth: I’d ask them to give overweight nannies a chance. Ask for a trial period. Watch how they interact with your children and how they advocate healthy eating and habits. Don’t make snap judgments about a nanny’s appearance. Don’t ask for medical records or make cutting remarks about exercising or the food the nanny eats. Be respectful. If you feel it’s not working out, then find someone who will fit better with your family – but don’t assume it won’t work out upon first meeting an overweight nanny. Let her show you who she really is.

eNannySource: What makes you so passionate about this topic?

Elizabeth: I’m passionate about this topic because I’m an overweight woman who has dealt with a lot of fatphobia and prejudice. I’ve also seen how society treats people who are overweight. I want the truth to come out about overweight people – many of them are happy and follow healthy living principles. Many are completely healthy, with no health problems. Fat doesn’t mean they’re lazy, unable to work or addicted to McDonald’s. I feel I can’t stand by and watch this prejudice keep happening. I also apply this to other injustices and prejudices I see in the world. As a writer, my words have the ability to move people. I remember that I have that gift and try to use it for good.

eNannySource: Tell us about your childcare background.

Elizabeth: I’ve been in the childcare business for 17 years and have been a nanny, part-time and full-time, for over 10 years. I currently work part-time with four families in the Toronto area and specialize in the care of infants and toddlers. I love children and count myself lucky that I get to do the things I love, including writing and caring for children, every day.

Elizabeth Hawksworth is a Canadian poet, blogger and short story writer. A busy marketing professional and nanny in Toronto, Ontario, she enjoys taking in the sights and sounds of her city, writing historical fiction and herding her two cats, Athena and Ophelia. Elizabeth blogs about feminism, body positivity, fatphobia, writing, nannying and social justice at http://www.elizabethahawksworth.com. You can follow her on Twitter at @liz_hawksworth, and on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/Torontonanny.You can also find her on the Huffington Post, here: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/elizabeth-hawksworth/. 

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Expert Insights: Nanny Tax Myths with Guy Maddalone of GTM Payroll Services, Inc.

September 1, 2013

by Michelle LaRowe
Editor in Chief

When it comes to employing a nanny, it’s important to know what’s true and false. Guy Maddalone, founder and president of GTM Payroll Services, Inc. and household payroll and tax expert, provides some important insight that can help separate fact from fiction.

eNannySource: True or False: It’s legal to pay nannies through your company’s payroll.

Guy: False

It is not proper for an employer to pay a household employee through their business payroll. A household employee is an employee of the home, not the business, and therefore would not qualify for the tax deductions that would otherwise be allowed with a traditional business employee. In most cases, federal household employment taxes must be paid on the employer’s personal federal income tax return, either annually or quarterly.  The only exception to reporting federal household employment taxes on the employer’s personal federal income tax return is if they are a sole proprietor or if their home is on a farm operated for profit.  In either of these cases, the employer may opt to include federal household employment taxes with their federal employment tax deposits or other payments for the business or farm employees. For more information, refer to IRS Publication 926.

eNannySource: True or False: Nannies are entitled to overtime pay.

Guy: True and False (in some cases)

According to the U.S. Department of Labor, the federal Fair Labor Standards Act (FLSA) requires employers to pay overtime pay of one and a half times the regular pay rate.  Overtime pay must be paid for hours worked over 40 hours per week. However, some live-in nannies are exempt from overtime depending on the state in which they are employed.  Employees hired to provide baby-sitting services on a casual basis, or to provide companionship services for those who cannot care for themselves because of age or infirmity, are exempt from the FLSA’s minimum wage and overtime requirements, whether or not they reside in the household where they are employed. State and local laws for overtime vary and may supersede the federal FLSA law. Consult a certified professional at GTM for more information at (888)432-7972, or contact your state department of labor for your state’s specific laws.  A household employer should specify in the work agreement when approved overtime can occur and what the specific rate of pay will be to avoid conflict when the issue arises.

eNannySource: True or False: Nannies are independent contractors.

Guy: False

There are specific differences between an employee and an independent contractor. An employee is a person who takes instruction from the employer, has a schedule set by the employer and uses tools and equipment provided by the employer. An independent contractor is a person who works under their own conditions, sets their own schedule and uses their own supplies. Most nannies who work in an employer’s home, whether it be on a temporary or full-time basis, are considered household employees, not independent contractors, because they work under the family’s control and have their schedule and pay set by the family. In the past, the IRS has made determinations that caregivers are considered employees and it is illegal for a family to treat them as independent contractors.

eNannySource: True or False: Employers do not need to track a nanny’s hours.

Guy: False

According to the U.S. Fair Labor Standards Act, employers are required to keep records on wages, hours and other items as specified by Department of Labor regulations. These records include hours worked each day and total hours worked each week.  The risk of not keeping proper time records is that it is difficult to prove the hours an hourly employee has actually worked and when they may be eligible for overtime pay in the event of a wage and hour audit by the Department of Labor.

eNannySourCE: True or False: Only full-time nannies need to be paid legally.

Guy: False

Any household employee who earns $1,800 (2013) or more in a calendar year must be paid legally and the employer must withhold Social Security and Medicare taxes regardless of whether they work on a part-time or full-time basis. Employers must pay federal unemployment tax for any employee who earns wages of $1,000 (2013) or more in a calendar year. Since the wage threshold for these requirements is low, many times even the most part-time employee needs to be paid legally.

 

Guy Maddalone, Founder and CEO of GTM Payroll Services Inc., is a 25 year veteran of the payroll, human resource and employment services industry. Originally starting with the placement of home healthcare and eldercare personnel, he then expanded his business to include nannies and other household staff. In 1991, he founded GTM Payroll Services to provide payroll & tax administration for households, the first in the industry. Guy is a household employer himself and the author of How to Hire a Nanny: A Household HR Handbook – Your Complete Guide to Finding, Hiring, and Retaining a Nanny and other Household Help (SPHINX LEGAL). He is widely-recognized as the nation’s household employment expert and believes in sharing his personal and professional industry knowledge with the employment community.

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Expert Insights: Nanny Employer Tax Facts with Guy Maddalone of GTM Payroll Services

August 19, 2013

by Michelle LaRowe
Editor in Chief

When it comes to tax responsibilities for nannies and employers, separating fact from fiction can be hard. Enter Guy Maddalone of GTM Payroll Services, who is here  to set the record straight and answer some of the most common questions nannies and parents face.

eNannySource: What are a nanny employer’s legal tax responsibilities?

Guy: If an employer pays cash wages of $1,800 (2013) or more to their household employee, they must withhold Social Security and Medicare taxes. Employers are not required to withhold Federal and State income taxes unless it is agreed upon by both parties. If income taxes are not withheld throughout the year, your nanny will be responsible for paying them at the end of the year. If an employer pays a total of $1,000 (2013) or more per quarter to a household employee, then they must pay federal unemployment tax.

eNannySource: What are the risks of non-compliance?

Guy: By not paying payroll taxes, the employer risks being investigated by the IRS, which could result in hefty fines of $25,000-$100,000, penalties and potential jail time. They will also be responsible for the payment of all back employment taxes, interest and penalties and will not be eligible for tax breaks like the Dependent Care Assistance Program or the Child Tax Credit. Additionally, if you are in a state that requires workers compensation insurance and you do not pay taxes, you cannot obtain the insurance, and as a result if your nanny becomes injured on the job you could be responsible for her lost wages and medical expenses. Paying taxes for your household employee allows you to take advantage of a flexible-spending plan by using their salary as a qualifying expense.

eNannySource: How can an employer become compliant?

Guy: The first step in becoming compliant is to understand the tax, wage and labor laws regarding household employment and what you are responsible for. As an example, employers pay Social Security, Medicare, unemployment insurance and may be required to have a workers compensation policy for their household employee. They must also pay at least minimum wage and overtime, in most cases, to employees who work more than 40 hours per week, or in some states more than eight hours per day. It is important for household employers to understand their specific state laws, as some states have laws protecting domestic workers and requirements that need to be followed. Since dealing with taxes, wages and insurance is often time-consuming and complicated, many household employers choose to use the services of a professional payroll service, such as GTM’s EasyPay®, that can give you a free tax, wage, labor and insurance consultation and provide you with the steps you need to take to become compliant.

eNannySource: What is the typical nanny employer tax liability?

Guy: Rates differ based on the state in which a family employs a nanny, however GTM estimates that employers can expect to pay nine to 12% of the employee’s gross pay for federal unemployment insurance, Social Security, Medicare, state unemployment insurance and other state and local taxes. Based on the amount of their wages, employees can expect to pay 10-30% of their gross pay for Social Security and Medicare, federal and state income taxes, and other state and local taxes. For more information, use GTM’s free Nanny Tax Calculator.

eNannySource: What if the nanny agrees to be paid under the table?

Guy: This is dangerous and against the law. Nannies can face IRS penalties due to failure to file income taxes. As a practical matter, a nanny who accepts wages “under the table” will not have any unemployment insurance benefits if they become involuntarily unemployed, workers compensation if they get hurt or sick on the job or a legal employment history and credit history if they are trying to establish credit to buy a car or a home. Also, since they do not make contributions to Social Security or Medicare, they will not be eligible for these benefits when they retire. It is a good idea to create a work agreement in order to document the requirements of the position and establish a clear understanding between employer and employee of what is expected, how much they will be paid, when they will be paid and the manner in which they will be paid.

 

Guy Maddalone, Founder and CEO of GTM Payroll Services Inc., is a 25 year veteran of the payroll, human resource and employment services industry. Originally starting with the placement of home healthcare and eldercare personnel, he expanded his business to include nannies and other household staff. In 1991, he founded GTM Payroll Services to provide payroll & tax administration for households, the first in the industry. Guy is a household employer himself and the author of How to Hire a Nanny: A Household HR Handbook – Your Complete Guide to Finding, Hiring, and Retaining a Nanny and other Household Help (SPHINX LEGAL). He is widely-recognized as the nation’s household employment expert and believes in sharing his personal and professional industry knowledge with the employment community.

 

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Expert Insights with Dr. Caron Goode on Nannies Becoming Parent Coaches

August 12, 2013

by Michelle LaRowe
Editor in Chief

Over the years I’ve had the opportunity to work with Dr. Caron Goode, Ed. D, NCC on a variety projects. During the time we’ve spent together I’ve learned a lot from her about the importance of truly understanding yourself as well as others, their viewpoints and their temperaments, as well as how this understanding can positively impact relationships. Dr. Goode has developed a natural connection with nannies, and has presented at INA’s Annual Conference as well as mentored many nannies through her parent coaching program. Recently we had a chance to catch up and talk about the trend of nannies becoming parent coaches. Here’s a little of what she had to share.

eNannySource: What is a parent coach? 

Dr. Goode: Parent coaches help parents to solve problems and navigate the predicaments or issues that they face. Parent coaches utilize the empowerment model and strive to help parents to be successful in their approach to parenting in many areas, including in their communication, structure, stress management and discipline styles. Coaches celebrate achievement with their clients, and assist, inform, inspire and educate them. They provide clarity, reflection and reality checks rather than taking the fix-it approach.

eNannySource: Why should nannies consider becoming a parent coach?

Dr. Goode: Nannies who have become parenting coaches have found the role to be a refreshing one to play. We’ve had several nannies go through the program.  They enjoy the empowerment model, and since they are experts in adaptation when they work with families for many it’s naturally a good fit.

As a coach you learn to coach others and adapt through transitions. To do this nannies learn how each of the core four temperaments adapts differently, responds to stress uniquely and how learning preferences and sleep preferences can be shaped for the parent or  the child.

Nurturing is what nannies do best, yet nurturing nature’s specific contribution to a child’s personality and helping parents understand how to do the same is a different process. Coaching gives nannies another viewpoint and way to work with families. For those desiring to coach for additional income, or to have a home-based business when shifting careers, our coaching program trains them to develop their blueprint for being an entrepreneur who works from home.

eNannySource: What parent coaching skills can nannies use every day on the job?

Dr. Goode: A nanny who is trained in coaching skills learns how to ask powerful questions, enabling another to come up with a solution or answer and then to try it out. The whole idea is to enable the experience of success, which is determined by discovering the level of willingness, level of commitment, learning preference and how much support is needed. Nannies can serve as a coach to help parents with values, communication, discipline and consequences styles.

I believe nannies are empowered by the coaching process. The empowerment model gives them a whole new worldview of how service can be offered and respected.

eNannySource: What is your parent coaching certification process like?

Dr. Goode: Specific courses are required for certification in order to fulfill the ethics and guidelines requirements of the International Coach Federation. The coaching courses are offered as webinars. Students dial in to the conference via phone or Skype, and all of us can interact. The webinar on their computer screen offers the course material as the instructor presents it. Other self-paced courses are offered globally through digitalchalk.com.

eNannySource: What are the benefits of having parent coach certification?

Dr. Goode: Aside from adding to a nanny’s credentials and portfolio of knowledge, the information in this program is truly leading-edge, and is not found in any child development courses. The neuroscience research, and believe it or not, the sleep research have opened new avenues in how we can help children learn, thrive and be in good health.

If nannies are not savvy or informed about core temperaments, they may end up like frustrated parents – trying this method and that method without results. They must know that their people skills and success in interactions depends on their understanding of how the parents and children they work with react. Reactions are predictable and nannies are in the prime position of making life easier when they understand the reaction patterns of family members.

Even though most nannies are active listeners, do they know how to address the emotional component beneath a conversation? Are they aware of how to be more assertive, or how to address problem issues of a parent in a compassionate way? If nothing else, the coaching model is about how to communicate and inspire!

 

Dr. Caron Goode is the founder of the Academy for Coaching Parents International, which trains and certifies coaches for parents and families.  She is the founder of HeartWise Coaching Institute, which certifies professionals in Relationship Coaching and Intuitive Coach-Consultant. She has served as a speech therapist, special education teacher, educational diagnostician, trainer for parents and educators and as a psychotherapist. She is the author of 22 print and digital books. To learn more about Dr. Goode and the Academy for Coaching Parents International visit http://academyforcoachingparents.com/. 

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Expert Insights on the Important Role of Fathers with Bestselling Author Rick Johnson

August 4, 2013

by Michelle LaRowe
Editor in Chief

Being a published author, I’ve had an opportunity to connect with some really amazing people whose daily work makes an extraordinary difference in the lives of everyday people. Rick Johnson is one of those folks. Passionate about marriage, families and the impact parents – especially dads – have on the lives of their children, Rick Johnson is in the business of equipping individuals to be better spouses, parents and leaders. Recently I got the chance to catch up with Rick and pick his brain on the topic of fatherhood. Here’s a bit of what he had to share.

eNannySource: How important are the relationships fathers have with their children?

Rick: A vast amount of research shows that fathers are fundamental in the lives of both sons and daughters.  A father is a boy’s first and most important role model of masculinity.  He teaches a boy how a man acts, thinks and faces life.  He shows him his roles in life and develops his value system.  He teaches him how a man loves a woman, as well important character traits such as self-discipline, respect and honor.

Likewise, fathers have incredible influence (positive or negative) on nearly every aspect of their daughter’s life. A father sets a huge role model for his daughter regarding the qualities she looks for in a man and the standards she maintains in her relationships. He is the first man in her life, and models how a man should treat a woman, how a man should act and how a man shows healthy love and affection to a woman. He also sets the standard for how a daughter feels she deserves to be treated by men. He even determines how a girl feels about herself (her self-image and self-value). If a father shows his daughter love, respect and appreciation for who she is, she will believe that about herself as a woman, no matter what anyone else thinks. Girls deprived of this fatherly love and affection make poor choices in an effort to fill that void.

All we need do is look at the outcomes of children without fathers (or who have uninvolved fathers) to determine the importance of their influence.  Fatherless children have significantly lower outcomes on virtually every measurable area in life.  Their educational outcomes are much lower than their fathered counterparts.  Kids from fatherless homes have higher incidents of crime, drug and alcohol use, promiscuity, unwed childbirth, poverty, abuse and emotional and behavioral problems than kids from homes with their fathers.

So yes, fathers are important.

eNannySource: How can moms encourage fathers to be more involved?

Rick: I encourage moms to realize that if dad does something differently than she does (which he will) that it’s not automatically wrong, it’s just different.  A man’s wife has tremendous power (especially in the home) to either lift him up as a father and garner him respect that he could never get on his own, or to crush him.  A woman’s contempt and scorn is devastating to a man, and is easily passed on to their children.  But, women who encourage their husbands to be involved dads allow him to utilize his tremendous influence to empower their children to be healthy, happy and successful in life.  I tell dads that their children’s mother is their greatest asset as a father.  Working together as a team, mothers and fathers bring so much more to their children than either can individually.

eNannySource: What do you have to say to working dads who work 60, 70 hours per week? How can they be active dads? What three practical tips do you have?

Rick: It’s important to remember that our most valuable commodity in life is our time.  Everyone has the same amount each day.  How we use it speaks volumes about what we feel is most important, primarily because we always find the time to spend on things we think are important (whether we admit it or not).  The opposite of love is not hate.  It’s indifference.  If we are indifferent to our children by ignoring them (not spending our time with them), what kind of message are we sending?  I’m highly offended when someone ignores me.  I expect our children are as well.

Now that I’ve offended every man out there, let me say I understand that sometimes you have to work a lot.  A father’s role is to provide and protect his family, and that requires doing what’s necessary sometimes to finish his work or even keep his job.  In those circumstances, here are a few tips to consider:

1)      Perhaps the most important thing in these circumstances is to not be preoccupied when you are present.  Don’t be distracted.  Females (of all ages) especially say they feel most loved when the important man in their life gives them his undivided attention.

2)      Spend focused time with your children when you are home.  If possible, find opportunities to spend alone time with each child.  Pick a day to take each one to lunch alone, go for a bike ride, etc.  I know this can be tough with limited time but time spent alone with your child magnifies its impact.

3)      Write to your children.  Send them texts during the day.  Mail them cards or letters when you are out of town or just busy at work.  Writing is a powerful form of communication (sometimes even better than verbal communication). This lets them know you are thinking about them even when you are not around—a very powerful message to send them.

eNannySource: What about male caregivers? What do you think of male nannies?

Rick: Well, admittedly I don’t know anything about male nannies, but I do know that for many kids any male role model is desperately needed.  Male teachers, coaches, uncles, grandfathers or male nannies might be the only positive male role models in a boys’ life.  It is a responsibility we men need to be aware of and act accordingly.

My organization, Better Dads, hosts summer camps for single moms and their kids.  We bring in a bunch of male volunteers to basically play with the kids all weekend while we hold workshops for the moms.  These children are so starved for masculine companionship that by the first night we see formerly angry young boys sitting on the laps of these volunteers, calmly staring into the campfire.  They are literally sucking up their male essence like dry sponges that crave masculine touch, affection and even just attention.  We see similar results in schools.  Anecdotal research shows that the very presence of an adult male has a very calming effect on the entire classroom.  If your son’s father is not involved in his life, it is imperative that you find positive male role models to be involved in his life.

eNannySource: What about boys…. It seems we are emasculating boys from the way we teach to the way we play. It’s no longer boys will be boys, but instead typical boy behavior is being labeled as bullied, etc. What do you have to say on this topic?

Rick: I would agree that we are either intentionally or inadvertently attempting to “feminize” boys and young men through our culture.  It is perhaps one reason why boys are struggling so much right now.  Many young men tell me they don’t feel very manly.  They don’t know why, they just know something isn’t right.  The teaching style currently employed in most of our public educational system makes it difficult for boys to learn, and they are showing the effects of it.  Being required to sit still and listen for long periods of time in a lecture style format goes against the way boys learn most effectively.  Boys, who are physical and often restless, have a need to move around to process information and their emotions.  Because this goes against the system, many are now being labeled.  It’s my opinion that too many boys are being medicated just for being boys.  Additionally, we often confuse normal male responses to stress as being too angry or aggressive.

I think lack of positive male role models in a boy’s life makes it very difficult for him to understand his natural roles in life.  We currently have such a high rate of fatherlessness in this country that boys and girls alike are suffering mightily.  Males are very visual and learn by observing.  A boy who lives with only his mother (and maybe grandmother), who has only female teachers, female Sunday school teachers and female Cub Scout leaders is a boy who has only female authority figures in his life.  How is he supposed to see a male’s perspective of life and how a man thinks, acts, solves problems?  How is he supposed to know what his role is as a husband, father and man?  Without the real thing to observe, he’ll get that from TV, movies and music videos—all extremely poor mentors of healthy masculinity.

eNannySource: How can nannies help to facilitate the father-child bond?

Rick: Any time an important care-taker in a child’s life (which a nanny is) can encourage a child to look up to, respect and appreciate his father helps to facilitate that bond.  So, for instance, if a nanny suggests a child ask his or her father’s opinion on a topic, instead of providing an instant answer, it edifies the father.  An example might be, “Wow—that’s an important question.  You know what?  If it were me, I’d want to ask my dad’s opinion on a big question like that.”  Additionally, from having done work with men over the past 13 years, I’ve come to realize that most men really do not understand how important they are in a child’s life as a father.  It’s not a message that men or fathers typically hear very often in our culture—that they are important.  A nanny can help a father realize that by sharing insights about his children that he may not know.  Also, by telling him directly (and often) how much his children look up to him, and maybe even sharing with him how important your father was in your life.

eNannySource: Anything else you’d like to add?

Rick: Yes; men, if you are struggling with your relationship with your child, I would encourage you to know that it’s never too late.  All children are born with an innate desire to love and respect their father.  They may close that off to guard their heart if you have un-reconciled issues, but that need never fully goes away.  Too many people are walking around today with deep father wounds for it to be inconsequential.  If you need to, apologize to your child and ask for their forgiveness.  You’ll be surprised how quickly that need to love and respect their father comes back.

Additionally, your children have a craving for healthy masculine affection from their father.  Give your kids plenty of hugs and kisses.

Good luck and good fathering.  Remember–you matter!

 

Rick Johnson founded Better Dads, a fathering skills program, based on the urgent need to empower men to lead and serve in their families and communities. He is the bestselling author of 10 books, including That’s My Son:  How Moms Can Influence Boys to Become Men of Character, Better Dads Stronger Sons:  How Fathers Can Guide Boys to Become Men of Character, The Man Whisperer—Speaking a Man’s Language to Bring Out His Best, That’s My Teenage Son: How Moms Can Influence Boys to Become Good Men, That’s My Girl: How a Father’s Love Protects and Empowers His Daughter, and The Power of a Man: Using Your Influence as a Man of Character,  all by Revell Publishing.  His book, Becoming Your Spouse’s Better Half: Why Differences Make a Great Marriage, is being used by many churches across the country for their couples study groups.  Rick’s newest book, A Man in the Making: Strategies to Help Your Son Succeed in Life, is due for release August 2013. To learn more about Rick and Better Dads, visit www.betterdads.net. 

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Expert Insights: Choosing Nursery Décor and Art with Sara Ardeleano of Sea Urchin Studio

July 31, 2013

by Michelle LaRowe
Editor in Chief

For many parents, decorating their baby’s nursery is a labor of love. Finding the right blend of elegance, sophistication and cuteness can be a real challenge – unless you have a background in design, of course. Recently I had a chance to catch up with Sara Ardeleano, designer and owner of the Sea Urchin Studio, and talk about things to consider when choosing nursery décor and art. Here is a little of what she had to say.

eNannySource:  What’s important when choosing designs for a nursery?

Sara: For me, the most important consideration is to choose artwork that a child will understand and appreciate. Color plays a big role as well.  I tend to work with colors that are calming and would be considered “gender neutral”, so that they will easily work in rooms that are specifically boy or girl, and often for both genders.  For example, our “Ocean Friends” print set looks great in a shared bathroom.  Lastly, while it may be tempting to buy artwork that suits a baby’s nursery, that stage goes by so fast.   Like clothing, investing in designs with “room to grow” means they will be appreciated longer.

eNannySource: How do you balance being stimulating with not being overly stimulating?

Sara: I strive to create a balance in my artwork through color choices, simple themes and engaging ideas.  While many of my pieces have a conversational quality to them – small details that tell stories or create a path for learning – the art can also be simply art until the child is ready to discover more.   Our alphabet prints are fun just to look at, for example, but over time children will naturally begin associating a letter with the name of an animal.

eNannySource: What type of art inspires children?

Sara: Children relate to and are inspired by ideas they can make a real-world reference to. Nature can be very inspiring, and children have a natural curiosity about animals in particular. I tend to illustrate animals with anthropomorphic qualities; they have emotions that you wouldn’t find in nature, but this is something that a child picks up on quickly.  If an animal looks happy, children accept it with enthusiasm and want to learn more about it.

eNannySource:  Why are eco-friendly products important when considering children’s spaces?

Sara: Eco-friendly products help to make homes safer, as well as have less negative impact on our earth.  It’s also a great way to start children thinking about sustainability, repurposing and recycling. Sea Urchin Studio uses recycled materials whenever possible, and chooses local, US-based vendors so that we can maintain better control over our products and the manufacturing process.

eNannySource:  What are your best tips for choosing a nursery theme?

Sara: Choosing a theme can be a great starting point for decorating a room.  Choose one that you have a connection to, and that will be familiar and comforting to your child.  If you live near the ocean, incorporating sea life into the room is a great way to expose your child to a very unique world he is living within.  If you are surrounded by woods, a child might be very happy to be with the animals she sees in her backyard.  If you travel, a special place or mode of transportation could be fun. While staying consistent in a theme is important; having a few non-conforming pieces is equally important.  The theme creates the foundation, the added details give the room character.

eNannySource:  What’s your favorite unisex room theme?

Sara: It’s probably obvious that I love anything related to nature. If I can bring the outdoors in – minus the mosquitos – I will!

Sea Urchin Studio is a boutique design company specializing in products that create captivating environments to inspire children. Focused on delighting young minds through creative expression, Sea Urchin’s uniquely themed art and design, applied to high quality prints, posters, growth charts and card sets, can be used in a myriad of ways to brighten and beautify interior spaces. Launched in 2010 by husband-wife team Dan and Sara Ardeleano, the Sea Urchin product line is already widely recognized for its playful, imaginative style and irresistible charm. Learn more about the Sea Urchin Studio at www.seaurchinstudio.com.

 

Michelle’s Review

Recently I had the opportunity to get up close and personal with some of the designs and artwork that Sea Urchin Studio puts out. I received a complimentary Sea and Shore Alphabet Print and Just Numbers Print to review directly from the studio. The package arrived in beautiful boutique wrapping and the textured, high quality paper looked and felt really luxurious. The prints were colorful and engaging. My children were in love with both prints, especially the Sea and Shore print since we live by the ocean. The faces on the animals really caught their attention.  The Sea Urchin designs are perfect for a playroom, nursery, child’s bedroom or bathroom. We’re currently working on writing numbers, so the Just Numbers print, featuring large font numerals, was also a hit – both for the kids and the grownups. With the perfect frame, the kids can have a reference for writing numbers hanging on the wall and the adults can have a have a classy piece of art to admire – which is way more pleasing to look at than an old school laminated poster of numbers.

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Expert Insights on Building a Secure Attachment with Dr. Jeanne Segal, co-creator of HelpGuide.org and author of The Language of Emotional Intelligence

July 25, 2013

by Michelle LaRowe
Editor in Chief

Recently I had a chance to chat with Dr. Jeanne Segal, co-creator of Helpguide.org, featuring the free Bring Your Life into Balance Tool Box and the Creating Secure Attachment video that I strongly encourage all nannies and parents to view. An expert in the field of emotional health, she provided fascinating insight into adult and child attachments, the bond between a child and a nanny and what parents and caregivers can do to foster the development of a child’s emotional intelligence. 

eNannySource: What does secure attachment look like in children aged birth to three?

Dr. Segal: At 0 to 3, a physically healthy child with a secure attachment is good at comforting himself, doesn’t cry all the time, doesn’t get upset quickly, smiles a lot, makes eye contact, makes sounds and really communicates. These children learn to trust fairly quickly and anticipate something that they need is coming. They use nonverbal cues to tell you they feel good and they are able to engage in nonverbal communication. They have reason to believe good things are coming and believe others are interested in them and in communicating with them.

eNannySource: What are three of the easiest things parents and caregivers can do to foster a secure attachment?

Dr. Segal: First, turn the cell phone off. Don’t use a cell phone when in the presence of a child. Second, make an effort to communicate. Third, learn the child’s language. Listen and try to understand and respond to the child’s nonverbal language.  Each baby’s cues will look different, but when you pay attention, you can figure out what they mean.

eNannySource: Can children have a secure attachment bond with their nanny? And if so, is that healthy?

Dr. Segal: Of course! They can and need to! Children need a secure attachment with one primary caregiver. If you really want to make a crazy kid, fire a nanny he’s attached to on the basis of the bond they share. When hiring a nanny, look for a nanny who can commit to two or three years. Once the bond is created you want to secure it. Parents should be thrilled, not threatened, and should thank their lucky stars if their child and nanny have a secure attachment bond. If your nanny is loving your child she is helping to create a loving human.

eNannySource: So can a child have a secure attachment bond with both parents and their nanny?

Dr. Segal: No. Children can have only one secure attachment bond at a time. Research shows us that. When we talk about secure attachment, we are talking about the attachment that makes the brain cohesive. One attachment creates that sense of cohesion. This does not mean that other relationships and bonds are not important and not meaningful, they are. But when we talk about secure attachment, it’s a brain phenomenon and the one who spends the most waking time with a child who will develop the secure attachment. That’s assuming that the caregiver is responsive and communicating in the nonverbal way. If not, then whoever communicates most and is most responsive will have the secure attachment bond.

Again this doesn’t mean that the child won’t bond with parents or other caregivers. It just simply means that the person who spends the most time in that nonverbal communication role will develop the secure attachment.

Parents who hire nannies want a caregiver who will spend time in this role. The more time spent in it the better the child’s brain will be. A good resource for parents and nannies on this topic is our article on Secure Attachment and Bonding. It outlines the difference between bonding and a secure attachment bond.

eNannySource: Do you think that there is any relationship between colic and secure attachment?

Dr. Segal: It’s hard to tell. If a baby has real pain and their gut is screwed up, they will cry because they are experiencing pain. If a baby is high strung in the first place and a mother or caretaker isn’t good at communication, that could create tension, make the baby more stressed and take away an infant’s sense of safety.

eNannySource: In your video you mention that stress will shut down a caretaker’s awareness. How concerned should nannies and parents be about a nanny’s level of stress on the job?

Dr. Segal: Very concerned. If a nanny is stressed, she won’t be good at nonverbal communication. When you are highly stressed, you go into automatic flight or fight mode. When highly stressed a caretaker isn’t able to think clearly or pick up on nonverbal cues. It can be dangerous. The child should always be the first priority.  Parents should look for a relaxed person who settles them down when they are with them when choosing a nanny.

People confuse the flight or fight stress reflex with emotion, which can give emotions a bad rap. Everyone needs stress to live. We all operate in a range of stress. Without stress we are dead. We need stress to live, to keep us awake, alert and motivated. When stress becomes out of range or out of balance because we feel threatened, the nervous system can’t work. Then the automatic response kicks in that we can’t control. A person may appear angry, agitated or withdraw or freeze. When this happens it looks emotional, but it’s a reflex and, until the stress is back in balance, the reflex will stay until the threat has passed.  Emotion flows and moves. We can be angry, frightened and loving at the same time. Think of a parent who is waiting for her child to come home. It’s midnight. She is scared, she wants to kill him, but when he comes home she is overjoyed. These differences are often not detected and can be confused.

eNannySource: What is emotional intelligence and how important is it?

Dr. Segal: Emotional intelligence is really accessing the midbrain, the emotional and most important part of the brain. When we lose our frontal cortex you can still recognize us. When you lose your emotional brain you are gone, as your personality is there. Emotional intelligence turns out to be so much more important than we ever knew.

People who have emotional intelligence are people who are aware of what their emotional brain is saying. They are in touch and aware of their emotions, and their decisions are made using that information. Their decisions are not made entirely on feelings, but they do factor in. Emotional intelligence means you’re in touch with and trusting of your instincts.

eNannySource: How can parents and nannies foster the development of emotional intelligence?

To raise an emotionally intelligent child, you have to be emotionally intelligent. That’s the only way you can raise them that way. Words don’t mean much, it’s what we do and how we behave and interact that makes children socially and emotionally aware.

When we are aware of what we feel and interact with that, it gives us sensitivity and we are able to see the sensitivity of others. When a parent picks up on what their kids feel, he picks up on what others are feeling. This is how compassion and empathy is grown. Children get compassion and empathy from a compassionate and empathetic adult.

eNannySource: Is there anything else you’d like to add?

Dr. Segal: Most parents can’t do all of this. It’s not cultivated and we don’t have time for it. We are distracted. You have to slow down to do engage in this communication – you can send a text message a whole lot faster. It takes a few seconds more. There are huge numbers of people that are anxious and depressed—parents are struggling and they need to learn to be in touch with their feelings. Our Tool Kit helps you learn to reconnect with your emotions and learn skills you may have not learned unless you had a secure attachment – which many of us didn’t. It’s never too late to learn.

 

Dr. Jeanne Segal has been a psychotherapist helping individuals and families for nearly 40 years. Dr. Segal’s books have been published in 13 languages. She has served on numerous local and national nonprofit boards. Dr. Segal focuses on how individuals can empower themselves and bring about life-altering social and emotional change. To learn more visit www.helpguide.org. 

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Expert Insights: Keeping the Lunch Surface Cleaner with Evelyn Spooner of Matooga

July 22, 2013

by Michelle LaRowe
Editor in Chief

Sick of wondering about just how clean her grandkids lunch surfaces at school were, Evelyn devised a solution: a 100% washable, durable, cotton lunch mat designed especially for kids. Recently, I had a chance to catch up with Evelyn, learn about her company and discover the passion behind her products. 

eNannySource:  What’s Matooga? How did you come up with the name? What does it mean?

Evelyn: Matooga doesn’t have an actual definition or meaning.  Honestly, although I’m really creative when it comes to designing, I’m terrible when it comes to thinking of names. So I used DoAvenue.com‘s business naming service and they delivered a handful of names to me, of which Matooga was an instant winner! It incorporated the term “MAT” but added a whimsical, but catchy suffix. We loved the name and felt confident it reflected the professional but sometimes playful nature of the products we sell.

eNannySource:  Why placemats?

Evelyn: I originally started Matooga.com at the request of my grandchildren. They, and then all of their friends, were requesting so many lunch mats, I actually had to bring in help! That’s when I knew I had a winning product. The fun mats make kids feel special, and the moms love the functionality, convenient pockets, eco-friendliness, compactness and comfort of knowing that their kids’ lunch surface will be clean. The mats are ESPECIALLY popular among young girls, who love the ceremony that surrounds the use of the mats at school… it’s like having their own little pampering session or special party every day at lunch! And the boys generally love them simply because of the cool “boy” designs we have!

eNannySource: How dirty is the average lunch surface really?

Evelyn: How dirty is the average lunch surface? It depends. Honestly, most cafeterias, daycare facilities, etc., clean their surfaces after each meal takes place, but you still never know about subsequent passing sneezes, wiped-nose-to-hand-to-table transfers, etc., that may occur during other assemblies or activities that take place at the same tables – I have grandkids… I know!  Additionally, if you’ve ever seen firsthand what happens to Little Sarah’s sandwich during school lunchtime, you know that the actual food often ends up DIRECTLY ON the table! As a parent and grandparent, not knowing how or what the surface was cleaned with, I’m just not comfortable with that. The peace-of-mind, simplicity and general cleanliness that comes with having a known-to-be clean lunch mat that kids are happy to place their food on is a no-brainer to me.

Aside from cleanliness, our lunch mats are ideal for children (or adults) with food allergies, especially severe food allergies.  Anyone with severe food allergies knows the extreme precautions that need to be taken to prevent exposure to the offending allergen. Our lunch mats provide an added layer of protection in such daily health critical situations. Our parents of children with food allergies LOVE our mats and typically order about a dozen so they have enough to interchange during the week.

eNannySource:  Does using a washable placemat like Matooga help keep kids healthy at school?

Evelyn: Yes, Matooga lunch mats are a great tool in the fight to help keep children healthy at school! Of course, all other healthy precautions should continue to be taken in the overall effort to keep kids from getting sick, but again, knowing that the surface your child’s food is on is clean by your own standards is a great weapon.  And regarding washing, our mats stand up extremely well to multiple washings, really adding to their extreme value and eliminating the worry of having to wash them too frequently. The mats my grandchildren use have endured over 50 washings and still look close to new!

eNannySource: Tell us about the material used. Is it ecofriendly?

Evelyn: All our mats are 100% cotton, exclusive of trim, making them extremely eco-friendly.

eNannySource: Is the mat food safe?

Evelyn: Absolutely! The 100% cotton we use doesn’t contain any harmful dyes or other contaminates. Cotton is the ideal surface for food as it’s durable, resistant and easy to clean.

eNannySource:  Anything else you want to add?

Evelyn: One thing that’s not immediately obvious is the value of the mats. People are immediately attracted to the cute, stylish, practical or handsome styles, but one thing that everyone who uses them comments on is their durability and value. Given that the mats wash so well and still look as good as ever after many, many washings, people definitely get their money’s worth because they practically last forever!

And one last thing to mention is their versatility. The mats are used at the dinner table, at picnics, during doll (and REAL) tea parties, to wrap utensils for potlucks and any other uses that can benefit from a cute cloth! So they’re not just for lunches!

And lastly, my daughter Monta wanted me to add that her favorite part of the mats is that she can pack up the kids’ lunches the night before, tucking the utensils, treats, etc. into the folded mats and packing them up all nice and neat into their lunch bags so she doesn’t have to worry about forgetting any of those things in the morning madness the next morning.

 

Evelyn Spooner is a designer and owner of Matooga. In 2012, she started Matooga.com to put her designing talents to good use and to share the mats and runners her family and friends have enjoyed for years! As she approaches her first anniversary of being in business, she is still thrilled each day to be earning a living doing something that she loves so much.

 

Michelle’s Review

Evelyn was kind enough to send me a complimentary set of Matooga lunch mats to check out with my own children. During a meal, it’s not unusual for part of my children’s meal to “rest” directly on the table, and it’s certainly not unusual for them to pick it back up and continuing eating it. Gross – and that’s at home. Now consider at school or even at a restaurant. There’s a reason they supply paper placemats, right? Knowing that my children’s lunch surface is clean makes me cringe a whole lot less when I know the likelihood of part of their meal hitting it is 99%. We’ve even used them at restaurants, where they come in super handy since you can pack the smaller sized utensils. The Matooga mats do wash well, but choose your detergent carefully. You don’t want the kids eating on a surface full of chemicals either.

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Expert Insights: Behind the Nanny Diaries with Author Nicola Kraus

July 14, 2013

by Michelle LaRowe
Editor in Chief

Recently I had the chance to chat with Nicola Kraus, co-author of New York Times #1 Best Seller, The Nanny Diaries. I was totally blown away with her depth of knowledge about nannies and her passion for how they should be treated. She was so easy to talk to and so willing to answer my questions. Wondering if there will be another nanny story? I was, and I have the answer for you below!

eNannySource: How did you research nannies for The Nanny Diaries?

Nicola: Actually, Emma and I were both nannies. Between the two of us we had worked for 30 families through college, and I also worked as a nanny full-time for two years after college.

eNannySource: What was the longest you were with a single family?

Nicola: Two years.

eNannySource: How have nannies responded to the book?

Nicola: We were blown away with how nannies responded. We wrote the book because we were very angry, but had no idea how it would resonate. It was a mixed feeling, because we were so deeply touched that it resonated with those who do the work, yet we wrote about the worst case scenario and you never want to hear from someone that that is their real life. So it was gratifying and horrifying.

eNannySource: Why were you angry?

Nicola: We were horrified in part by how we had been treated.  But we knew, as badly as we had been treated, we were so blessed because we were white and college educated with social security numbers. We looked at the women working around us and no one was there to speak up for them. This was before Domestic Workers United, before the internet gave nannies a way to unite nationally. So many at the park were isolated in their experience and didn’t know there was a way for them to begin to get adequate pay and respect. All of this together motivated us to write the book. But we tried to make it funny so it was something that people would want to read.

eNannySource: Are you surprised to learn that many nannies would say your story line is closer to fact than fiction?

Nicola:  No.

eNannySource: How did you feel when it was being marketed as nonfiction and people were trying to find the family?

Nicola: On one hand, we were flattered the book seemed so true to life, but it’s hilarious to think that there’s only one obnoxious family on the Upper East Side. On the other, it was also insulting because we did so much work to turn our miserable stories into one fun, plot driven and page turning book. For people to think we turned the diaries of two people into one story seemed dismissive.  I think if we were boys that wouldn’t have happened.  When men write stories about the domestic experience it’s literary fiction, when women do it’s commercial fiction.

eNannySource: I read in one of your interviews you or Emma said, “We really set out in all our books to say something.” What were you trying to say in The Nanny Diaries?

Nicola: It’s a job. Nannies are often treated like some woman with a massive amount of estrogen just showed up and wanted to have one long extended playdate with your child with no pay, no sick days, no bonus. You should treat your nanny how you want to be treated, with a working contract, set hours, communication and respect.

eNannySource: What did you think of the movie?

Nicola. I’ll tell you, before we started the interview you told me that it resonated for you and your nanny friends and that is the final verdict for me.  We had never heard from real nannies if the film captured what the book tried to, but if you say it did then we’re satisfied. 

eNannySource: I wanted to name my son Grayer, but my husband said no. Where did the name Grayer came from?

Nicola: It was one from one of the many brain storming sessions we have. My parents have friends with the last name Greyer. I also worked for a family who had a little girl with a similar name and the memory of her always stayed with me because she was so sad. Between the two it just came to us.

eNannySource: Do you have a nanny?

Nicola: No, I don’t. My little girl has been in a daycare in our neighborhood. I was way too intimidated to hire a nanny. We are so keenly aware of the hard work it is, I felt like it would be impossible for me to give feedback.  Nannies are trying so hard to do their best. I would never be able to manage it. I know too much.

I am glad I chose daycare because it’s fascinating to see how parents are led to the worst assumptions every time. I remember this one time parents were mad and saying their kids were starving when they picked them up. They were positive the kids were not being fed. Instead of just thinking, wow, lunch was a few hours ago, I’d be hungry, too, they just assumed the kids weren’t being fed. I mean, think about it this way. It means they’re not stuffing Goldfish in their face nonstop to get a break for themselves and the kids are coming home and will eat their dinner, as they should be. I was able to facilitate communication between the school and parents and intercede on the daycare and teachers’ behalves and remind people that the caregivers are doing their best.

Now, as a mom, the other moms say things to my face- the things I suspected they were thinking when I was a nanny. Parents work themselves into a self-righteous snit. I just don’t get it.  Nannies and caregivers should be treated with gratitude and respect. Emma and I tear up when our kids’ teachers and nannies are kind, caring, engaged and affectionate. We are grateful.

eNannySource: What are you up to these days? What’s the next book? When can we expect it?

Nicola: Our next book will be out August 27. The First Affair. It’s our seventh novel and is about a young woman who takes an internship at the White House and gets seduced by the President.

eNannySource: How did you come up with that?

Nicola:  Well, after the national obsessions with Mr. Big and Christian Grey, Emma and I wanted to really look at sex and power.  In our culture we tend to put a disproportionate amount of blame on women, yet are so forgiving of men. Charlie Sheen had a full meltdown, punched a woman and got a multimillion dollar TV deal.  Anthony Weiner is leading in the polls.  But Britney Spears is still legally controlled by her father.  The book explores our cultural feelings on sex, power, scandal and redemption.

eNannySource: Will we see another nanny story?

Nicola: We love the characters in The Nanny Diaries and Nanny Returns!  We would love to write about Nan as a mom and trust that a story will reveal itself to us at some point …

 

Nicola Kraus and Emma McLaughlin have written seven novels together. The First Affair will be released on August 27, 2013.  To learn more about Nicola and Emma visit www.EmmaandNicola.com or follow them @nannydiaries. 

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Expert Insights on Choosing the Best Double Stroller with Melissa Gambrill, Marketing Manager from Britax Child Safety, Inc.

July 7, 2013

by Michelle LaRowe
Editor in Chief

When it comes to baby gear, choosing the right products for your family is essential. I’ve been a longtime fan of the Britax brand and was pleased to have the opportunity to connect with Melissa Gambrill, marketing manager for Britax, and pick her brain about what parents should consider when choosing the best double stroller for their family. If you’re wondering what features make her must have list, read on.

eNannySource: What do you think parents should look for when choosing a double stroller?

Melissa: Whether you are choosing a car seat or stroller, safety should always come first, followed by convenience. Britax has been the leader in child safety seats for more than 70 years, so when you’re talking about our products, I know safety is covered and we can move right on to convenience. For parents, a double stroller should make the travel experience easier.  I always encourage parents to test drive a stroller before they buy one. As a parent myself, I looked for a stroller that was lightweight, had versatile seat options and had seats with easy-to-move harnesses to accommodate my kids who always like to switch seats. Since parents like to stuff a lot into the cargo bags, choosing a stroller that gives you front access so you can grab whatever you put in first, easily, is also important. An articulating handle is also huge since it allows parents and caregivers of different heights to use the stroller comfortably.

eNannySource: Many parents are concerned about a side by side, thinking it may not fit through standard doors. What are your thoughts on this?

Melissa: Britax makes sure that every product is thoughtfully designed and innovated. We design our strollers to fit through a standard door frame. But even beyond that, we consider how parents are actually going to get into the door, whether it opens for them or they have to open it themselves. Our double strollers have front swivel wheels that allow for turning on a dime. Parents can get through a standard door without having to do a three-point-turn, which is especially important when you’re pushing the stroller and trying to hold the door open yourself.

eNannySource: The BRITAX B-Agile is extremely lightweight and has a compact fold. Why is this so important?

Melissa: We really try to combine convenience, comfort and ease of use into our products. We also want to make sure our products are used correctly each time.  For me, an easy, compact fold was a purchasing-driving force. Folding the B-Agile is a snap and it could fit into the car that I already owned.  In the garage or the apartment hallway, having a handle that goes forward an extra notch allows the stroller to stand vertically, which minimizes the amount of space it takes up when you’re not using it.

eNannySource: When do children typically outgrow a stroller?

Melissa: Our strollers are designed to max out based on weight, rather than age. Our B-Agile can hold up to 50 pounds in each seat. Our BOB brand’s Duallie double stroller is the same way. But once you start loading diaper bags and purses, you do need to be careful not to overload them. Safety should always come first.

eNannySource: What makes the B-Agile Double unique?

Melissa: One of the unique features about the B-Agile is its ability to turn into a travel system. Our infant seats match the colors of the stroller so you can color-coordinate the infant seat with the stroller. The B-Agile comes with the infant car seat receiver accessories, so you don’t have to pay more for a conversion kit. Another unique feature is that the B-Agile Double can accommodate two child trays.  The two canopies on the B-Agile Double are also huge, which offers lots of shade from the hot summer sun. The no-rethread, adjustable, five-point harness and infinite seat recline positions are pretty distinct too.

eNannySource:  B-Ready or B-Agile?

Melissa: Oh that’s a tough one. It’s all about the test drive. What feels comfortable? What’s going to make traveling easier? You should consider what your needs are and choose the one that’s the best match for you.

Michelle’s Review of the Britax B-Agile Double

Being a diehard Britax B-Ready fan, when my Britax B-Agile Double arrived in the mail courtesy of Britax (at no cost to me) I wasn’t sure how I’d like it. After getting it out of the box and taking it on its debut cruise up and down the streets of Historic Main Street in Hyannis, Massachusetts, I have to say I was impressed. It was super easy to open and fold and it was lightweight. It handled amazingly well carrying my 40 pound four-year-old and 39 pound three-year-old side-by-side. It surely didn’t feel like I was pushing 89 pounds of kid along.  In fact, it was such a smooth and comfortable ride they both fell asleep on the way back, which gave me the opportunity to navigate in and out of the little shops with ease. The extra-large canopy offered tons of protection from the sun and the harness straps had more than enough room to allow for growth, which was a nice surprise since much of the gear that advertises a higher weight limit seems to forget that kids who weigh more are typically taller, too. And although I didn’t need them, an added bonus was that the adapters to hold an infant car seat came right along in the box, which is going to be a money saver for moms who need it.  Being a nanny who specialized in caring for twins for many years, I wouldn’t hesitate recommending the B-Agile Double as an alternative to the typical go to side-by-side umbrella style stroller I usually recommend for moms of multiples because it’s lightweight and convenient to use. The Britax B-Agile Double is all that and more.

Melissa Gambrill is the stroller marketing manager for Britax Child Safety, Inc. With more than 10 years of experience in consumer products, she launches new products and supports strategic partnerships with organizations like Stroller Strides® and IRONMAN®. She is a Nationally Certified Child Passenger Safety Technician who educates new parents on the options and features to consider when purchasing, assembling and installing child safety seats and strollers. Melissa enjoys experiencing the outdoors with her husband and two toddlers. Learn more about Britax at www.BritaxUSA.com. 

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