Archive for September, 2011

Barbaric or Better? 10 Ways Kids Were Disciplined in the 70′s

Friday, September 30th, 2011

Sometimes I stop and reflect on my childhood which is mostly full of very fond memories of growing up in the 70′s and 80′s.  We had an amazing family which spent a ton of time together playing outside, going on picnics, and all kinds of other fun activities.  Of course, being a kid I would frequently make bad decisions that would result in me actually deserving to be punished (even though I completely disagreed back in the day).  I was particularly fond of competing, fighting, and generally pestering my brother.  Well needless to say my parents had to step in and correct both of us on multiple occasions and sometimes they did it using techniques that no doubt would be considered barbaric by today’s standards.  However, as I go through this list I think it’s worth at least considering whether in some cases these truly are barbaric or possibly better and more effective ways to discipline children.

  1. Spanking – A common form of discipline that has been all but eliminated today is spanking. Now known as corporal punishment, hitting a child in any way has been outlawed in 24 countries worldwide. My parents never spared the rod to spoil the child and our biggest fear was to get the paddle instead of the hand. I have to say it was effective without leaving any visible/permanent scars. My parents actually had a favorite paddle that they hung above the doorway leading to our bedrooms.  My brother and I frequently used our dart guns to knock the paddle down so we could hide it (especially if we knew we had done something wrong).
  2. No supper – Another typical punishment that is rarely practiced today is getting sent to your room without any supper. Hunger is a powerful motivator so this was also a pretty effective form of discipline. Not only were you denied nourishment, you also were secluded from the rest of the family as they enjoyed their evening meal, TV shows, and general fun (which always seemed to be 10X better than when you were out there with them).
  3. Washing your mouth out with soap – Back in the 70’s the penalty for lying, swearing or saying a dirty word was to get your mouth washed out with soap. This form of discipline would probably be considered barbaric today (we probably would need a few more studies on the ingestion of chemicals to be sure). I must admit, this was also very effective, because you didn’t hear children cursing or telling fibs nearly as often as you do today. The taste of soap can linger in your mouth for a very long time (trust me I know).
  4. Slap hands – It used to be pretty easy for a parent to let a child know what not to touch with a quick slap to the back of their hand. Now this would also be considered corporal punishment and is frowned upon. I remember a fourth grade teacher who would use a ruler to the back of your hand for discipline and she was greatly feared by all the students. However, there were no shenanigans going on in HER classroom.
  5. Stand in the corner – A standard discipline for a misbehaving child back in the 70’s was to be sent to a corner to stand there facing the wall for a set amount of time. This has been replaced with what is now called a “time out”. I really don’t see what the difference is other than the added humiliation of facing the wall and the physical demands of standing still for a long period of time.  With that said, just try it sometime and see how long it is before you want to cop a squat.
  6. Holding a match – Parents that caught their children playing with fire or matches had a rather barbaric method of teaching them a valuable lesson. To instill in their kids the dangers of fire, they were forced to hold a lighted match until it burned their fingers. This would really smart without causing a serious burn, but parents who tried this form of punishment today would probably be arrested (I’m quite certain this is a bad idea… but it is something you will never forget).
  7. Grounded for a month – As kids get older and too big to spank, the next most effective threat of punishment was to be grounded for a whole month. Modern parents don’t usually go to that extreme any more. A day or two (a week at most) seems to be the extent of time kids get grounded these days.
  8. Nasty chores – Parents of the 70’s could find very inventive ways to instill discipline in their children by making them do really nasty chores as punishment. Scrubbing floors with a toothbrush or cleaning the toilets were common retribution for any variety of misdeeds. Of course, farm kids had much more nasty, filthy jobs forced on them than city kids.  My least favorite had to be the toothbrush to the toilet (okay, ANYTHING involving the toilets).
  9. Embarrass them – A form of psychological torture parents would inflict on their misbehaving children was to embarrass them in front of their friends. Nothing could be worse than having all your friends know that you wet your bed or were caught with girly mags. How many kids were scarred for life by this inhumane treatment?
  10. Smoking – Parents who caught their kids smoking had an interesting way of teaching them a lesson by making them smoke cigarettes until they got sick. So you think you want to smoke? Try smoking the whole pack one after the other while your parents watch you turn green. It may have been cruel, but effective, at least for a while.  Of course, it could backfire on you as well…

I’m not sure why this popped into my head but it has been an interesting trip down memory lane for me.  Several of these techniques clearly belong in the past but I’m not so sure that a few of these techniques didn’t make me a better and stronger person in the end.  There does seem to be a general lack of discipline with a lot of kids nowadays and I’m sure there are multiple reasons why that is happening.  One of which could be that we have abandoned the harsher forms of discipline, but that’s the question of the day; were they barbaric or better?

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Top Reasons Your Nanny Needs to Be Certified in CPR

Thursday, September 29th, 2011

When considering qualifications you should require of your nanny, CPR training should be one of them. CPR training for infants and children, in particular, would be preferred. Hopefully, your nanny will never have a need to make use of that training, but in the event that it is needed, you will be glad you required that certification.

  1. Cardiac conditions – Children may have cardiac conditions that have not yet been  discovered by their pediatrician. CPR certification would mean that your nanny would have the means to deal with an unexpected cardiac arrest.
  2. Near-drowning – Parents deal with this frightening accident on a much too frequent basis. If it can happen when the children are in the care of their parents, it can certainly happen when they are in the care of a nanny. CPR training will teach a nanny how to deal with these types of water related accidents.
  3. Choking – If a child chokes on a small object or a piece of food, they may need resuscitation after their airway has been cleared from the obstruction. In addition to CPR certification, a nanny should also know how to dislodge an item from the airway of an infant or child.
  4. Suffocation – At times, the creative minds of children can put their safety in danger. Plastic bags placed over heads and crawling into air tight spaces have caused suffocation in children, which required CPR to resuscitate them.
  5. Electrical shock – We would hope that all your unused outlets have childproof covers, but even with these safety precautions, electrical shock can still occur. Electrical shock can cause cardiac arrest. CPR certification will prepare your nanny for dealing with such a tragic event.
  6. Other accidents – Any type of accident which causes a child to stop breathing and/or their heart to stop pumping will require CPR to be administered to your child immediately. Anyone who is caring for children should be trained in how to properly administer CPR in these situations.
  7. Allergic reactions – Extreme allergic reactions can sometimes require resuscitation with CPR. Allergic reactions can be caused by bee stings, insect bites or food allergies.
  8. Stroke – Although, strokes are primarily associated with the elderly, children have been known to suffer strokes as well. This is certainly a rarity, but it just one more reason why a nanny should have her CPR certification.
  9. Time factor – Whenever a person stops breathing or has a cardiac arrest, quick action is important. The sooner CPR is begun, the better the child’s chances of recovery. Emergency services may take several minutes to respond, and every one of those minutes should be filled with CPR application to the child.
  10. Certification is proof – Simply asking your nanny if she knows CPR is not sufficient. Ask for a copy of her certification and make sure that her certification is current. Training in CPR needs to be refreshed every few years to keep a person truly prepared in the case of an emergency.

Just as your nanny should be certified in CPR, parents should be also. Any situation that your nanny might encounter, you could encounter as well. Require it of your nanny, and make sure you require it of yourself as well. 

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Is the California Domestic Workers Bill of Rights Good for Nannies and Families or an Example of the Nanny State?

Thursday, September 1st, 2011

In California there’s been quite a bit of talk and some hysteria over a proposed bill, The Domestic Workers Bill of Rights or California 889.   The bill essentially requires domestic workers to be paid minimum wage and time and one-half based on the same rules as other workers.  It also requires employers to give their employee a paycheck stub that reports hours worked, pay, and deductions.

The provision that’s causing some hysteria and panic amongst families is the provision that requires the employer to give the nanny a 10 minute break every 4 hours and a 30 minute break every 5 hours.  People are saying they’ll have to hire two nannies to cover the time off.  Does that really make sense?  Don’t nannies get breaks now when the child is napping or watching TV?  How is this different from a mom talking on the phone and keeping an eye on her child at the same time?  Or, mom grabbing lunch while keeping an eye on their child.  Surely, the law doesn’t intend a break where the nanny leaves the child alone.  Personally, I think this reaction has to do more with people claiming “nanny state” than reality.

The part of the bill that will cause some pain will impact mainly seniors that have caregivers and senior care agencies.  This is because of the rules requiring live-in caregivers to have 8 hours off to sleep in a 24 hour shift and rules regarding pay.  This could be painful to seniors since it could drive up the cost of caregivers.

From what I’ve heard a similar-sounding law in NY state has had little impact on how nanny employers and employees work. For those interested here’s a link to an interview our nanny Claudia and I gave to NBC Los Angeles.

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Posted in hiring a nanny, Nanny Taxes | Comments Off