Archive for the ‘hiring a nanny’ Category

China’s “Octomom” spurs nanny hiring boom

Tuesday, January 24th, 2012

These Chinese octuplets, born with the help of in vitro fertilization and three different mothers, have raised ethical questions in a country known for its strict One Child policy for population control.

So you already know the challenges of hiring a nanny for your busy family.  Imagine all the background checks and job interviews you’d need to hire 11 perfect candidates!

In Guangzhou, China, an unidentified wealthy couple has just sent shockwaves throughout the country for engineering the birth of octuplets in a blatant defiance of the Chinese “One Child” policy. According to the Associated Press, the couple was discovered by the media after bringing their children to a local photo studio for a series of cutesy costumed poses.

From the AP report:

“… many Chinese were amazed to learn that a couple had spent nearly 1 million yuan ($160,000) and illegally enlisted two surrogate mothers to help have the four boys and four girls.

The incident has highlighted both the use of birth surrogates, a violation of Chinese law, and how wealthy Chinese do as they please, with scant regard for the rules that constrain others. The most-common reaction, though, has been simple disbelief.

… Chinese media are calling the mother babaotai muqin, or Octomom, a reference to the American woman who gave birth to octuplets using in vitro fertilization.”

The biological mother is believed to have given birth to two of her children, while two surrogate mothers gave birth to three children each.

The babies were born last October. The Guangzhou Daily, a government-run newspaper, reported that the mystery couple hired 11 nannies to handle the stress of being first-time parents with 8 newborns.  The paper also said that the couple and the babies are now “in hiding” to shield themselves from public resentment.

Hopefully, these babies won't be negatively impacted by the legal circumstances they obviously had nothing to do with.

The Chinese media’s “Octomom” reference, of course, is to tabloid darling Nadya Suleman, the single mom who notoriously had herself implanted with 12 embryos despite already having six children. It’s estimated that raising 14 kids at once costs $78,336, a figure that’s easy to understand once you’ve purchased your first case of diapers and baby formula.

Perhaps fueled by anger that her personal costs need to be subsidized by government assistance, Ms. Suleman recently had the dubious distinction of being voted near the top of America’s Most Hated List.  She recently told the TODAY Show that she feels like she is being scapegoated because she is an unemployed single mother.

“If I had a mate, that would have defused a lot of the animosity,” she told the NBC show.

Meanwhile, a recent survey of 1,200 mothers for TheBump.com and Forbes Woman concluded that 92 percent of working moms and 89 percent of stay-at-home moms feel overwhelmed by the stresses of everyday child care.

Sound like someone needs to search for a nanny ASAP.

And whether you need “only” one nanny or au pair to meet your family needs or 11 (!), check out our Safe Nanny Hiring Kit and our cost-effective monthly membership plans, which offer unlimited candidate searches and screenings!

Searching for a nanny like Mary Poppins?

Sunday, November 20th, 2011

Disney's Broadway tribute to "Mary Poppins" is fantastic PR for the nanny and au pair profession.

No matter how many applicants you screen with our Safe Nanny Hiring Kit — included with all levels of membership — chances are that you will not be hiring a magical nanny with a flying umbrella.

Not to say that a real-life Mary Poppins couldn’t exist, it’s just that in our experiences matching 450,000 nannies and families, we haven’t found one yet.

I’m much more familiar with Disney’s Academy Award-winning film with Julie Andrews and Dick Van Dyke, in which Mary dances with chimney sweeps and makes her children’s toys come alive. The 1964 classic was named the #6 Greatest Movie Musical of All Time by the American Film Institute in the same tier as “Singing in the Rain” and “The Wizard of Oz.”

However, the new Broadway incarnation is bringing the world’s first supernanny to whole new audiences. Disney’s Mary Poppins is playing to sellout audiences as star Steffanie Leigh, who prepared for the role by first working as a real Manhattan nanny, flies above the crowd on a wire!

How important is a nanny's personality in your hiring decision? In this scene from Disney's "Mary Poppins" on Broadway, authoritarian nanny Miss Andrew tries to force feed medicine.

Mary’s nemesis, Miss Andrew, provides the perfect personality contrast to showcase the extremes of child discipline. In a new interview with Broadway.com, actress Ruth Gottschall muses how her character especially riles up the kiddies in the audience:

“I don’t think of Miss Andrew as being mean. She may be strict, but in her mind she’s doing what she thinks is right, and knows exactly how things should be run in the Banks household. If the audience falls in love with you, that’s terrific, but if they hate you that’s even better. Sometimes I even get booed! If I had a dollar for every time a child starts to scream or cry when I’m onstage…

At last Saturday’s matinee I finished my song and a little boy behind our conductor screamed, “Geez, someone should stab her through the chest with a pitchfork!” It helps me think, “OK, I earned my paycheck this week!”

In the Mary Poppins story, the father (Mr. Banks) and his children (Jane and Michael) have philosophical differences about how to write the job description when hiring a new nanny. Banks wants a strict disciplinarian, while the kids naturally prefer a fun, whimsical woman. Poppins, of course, manages to be a blend of the two, teaching character values and life lessons while still being the most entertaining lady on earth.

When it comes to searching for a nanny to meet your family’s unique needs, you’ll probably be grappling with similar questions. Yes, nanny background checks are extremely important. But that is only one piece of the puzzle. Finding the right personality cannot be rushed, unfortunately.

The good news is that you’re not alone. Our Nanny Success Kit has proven itself thousands of times over, taking you through each step of the search and hiring process. Determine what personality traits and qualifications are most important to you as a parent — and don’t settle for anything less.

Here are some essential Nanny Interview Questions to get you started.

Have you already found your Mary Poppins?  Tell us how you found your favorite nanny — and the impact she is having on your family life. Please drop us a line at eNannyTips@gmail.com and you might be featured in a future blog!

What to Do When Your Nanny is Ill

Wednesday, October 5th, 2011

This news item may surprise a few of you, but it has come to our attention that nannies, even SuperNannies, are human. Yes, that’s right, your very own Mary Poppins is actually flesh-and-bone just like you. As such, she is prone to many of the vicissitudes of life that other humanoids are subject to. Your nanny may even, heaven forbid, fall victim to a disease or injury that may sideline him or her for a longer period of time. In addition, nannies have families too, and there may be times when her family will need her even more than you do (as impossible as that may seem). What, then, do parents do for interim childcare? Below you will find a few of the options that will help you fill the gap. One of these may work for you or you may even end up utilizing more than one of these resources, especially if your nanny will be out for a lengthy period of time.

  1. Get a Screened Temp – Sometimes the same agency that parents used to hire their nanny (like eNannySource) will be able to provide a temp for the duration of the original nanny’s absence.  This can be quick and offer you the same level of vetting that you used to get your permanent nanny.  It’s really important to be clear that this is a temporary position when you list this job to properly set the caregiver’s expectations.
  2. Friend of Nanny – Your nanny is likely to know other nannies, and she herself may be the one to steer you to temporary help. She may know someone that is between jobs or may even have a friend or relative that can stand in for her for a short period of time.  You should consider running a nanny background check on them as well just to be safe.
  3. Neighbor – If it’s only for a few hours and not for an extended number of days your neighbors may be a source of help in an emergency. If they also have children you may be able to work out a deal where you back each other up when/if the need arises.
  4. Yourself or Spouse – Depending on the duration of the absence, one or both parents may simply have to take some time off from work.  This is by far the most likely choice but it is not open to everyone.  Some people work jobs that make it virtually impossible to take time off without serious repercussions.  If you are lucky though… your boss is very supportive and as long as it isn’t a chronic problem you can take time off as needed to properly care for your kids.
  5. Family – If your nanny isn’t available and the other options have failed, then if you have family near by it’s time to start calling them to see who may be able to lend a hand.  Of course, grandpa and grandma are a top choice for the kiddos.  We would strongly encourage you to not abuse the generosity of your family though and respect their time by compensating them in some way for their assistance.
  6. College Students – If you live near a college you may find bulletin boards where students post availability for a variety of jobs. In a pinch, they could be the answer.  If you see a name up on one of these boards or even at the local grocery store you may want to pull one, interview them, and establish them as a backup plan for childcare at the very least.  This is another scenario where it’s important to run a background check to give you the confidence you need to trust them with your children.
  7. Babysitter – If you have a “go to” babysitter that you use for nights out on the town and/or other special occasions, you might want to contact them and see if they are available on an ad hoc basis in the event that you need them.  They may or may not have all of the skills and abilities of a professional caregiver, but if you know them that could be a big enough advantage when you are in a jam.
  8. Substitute – You may not have hired your nanny through an agency, in which case you might want to investigate the local temp agencies.  In general they can be quite expensive so your best bet may is to stick with an online service like eNannySource to get you out of these types of situations.
  9. Baby to Work Day – Workplaces differ, but sometimes parents can occasionally take their children to work with them. Some companies even have a childcare facility.  If this option is available, you should take advantage of it when possible because they are becoming exceedingly rare.
  10. The “Y” – Most communities have a “Y” (formerly YMCA), and most of them offer daycare and after-school care, which could be a viable option for families in-a-bind.  You should definitely check ahead to see if they take drop-ins or not.  If they do, then this is a very viable and safe option in most cases.  You can also check with local, quality daycare centers to see if they take drop-ins and have references you can quickly check out.

We hope that you don’t have too many needs to replace your nanny on a temporary or even permanent basis.  We do believe that consistency with caregivers is important for early childhood development.  With that said, life happens and you need to be prepared to handle just about any situation always making sure that the safety of your children comes first.  Apply great scrutiny and don’t be afraid to just take time off from work yourself if you have to in order to temporarily fill in for your nanny.

10 Reasons Nannies Don’t Love SuperNanny

Tuesday, October 4th, 2011

SuperNanny and its primary competitor, Nanny 911, are a pair of shows that television networks promote as “reality” programming. In both of these shows the set-up is basically the same, in that upper-middle-class families who have multiple children, who are not angels, need to call in expert help to save the families from imploding. The expert help is the super nanny, a regular Mary Poppins on steroids. The nannies come to the rescue of befuddled parents and caregivers, and they turn all the little imps (sorry… it’s true) into model children using little more than Dr. Phil types of advice. The nannies do everything so much better than anyone else can, and they make it look super easy. Reaction among nannies in the real world that you and I inhabit has been mixed, but tends toward not loving it and here are some of the reasons why:

  1. Unrealistic – “Reality” television is pretty much everything except reality. Networks and studios put these shows out because they are cheap to make and have a car-wreck appeal.
  2. False Comparisons – In the real world even a “super nanny” would not handle the crises as though everyone was on some kind of game show.
  3. Bad Advice – The simplistic solutions are hardly what is called for in a real situation. When a nanny actually has to handle a crisis, she has to be able to think on her feet, and she isn’t likely to find her answers in neat little packages.
  4. Dr. Phil – SuperDooperNanny is all about the image of “tough love” and control, and there is some merit to the approach, but it is taken much too far. When solutions are no more than recycled Dr. Phil advice, formulaic and domineering, there is little translation to what real families and nannies face every day.
  5. Only the Wealthy – Judging by the TV show, it seems that only well-to-do families with three-or-more children employ nannies, and it is hard for less affluent working parents to relate to the country club lifestyles portrayed on television.  The reality is that nannies can be very affordable for families with a modest budget especially compared to the rising costs of traditional daycare centers.
  6. Drama – There’s enough “drama” on one episode of SuperNanny or Nanny 911 to fill an entire decade of real life. More nannies have to deal with diapers and dishes than they do with most of the shenanigans on the shows.
  7. All About Nanny – Nannies are often considered part of the family, but the shows would have you believe that the nanny is the leading player, which is rarely the case.
  8. Takes Herself too Seriously – Nannies are professional caregivers, not philosophy professors and lecturers, and most families aren’t full of incompetent fools, which is how it seems to work on both shows.
  9. Guest Stars – SuperNanny gets to call in people like NBA star Dwayne Wade when she has a kid that needs a talking-to. Most real families would be lucky to get Larry the Cable Guy (“Get ‘er done!”).
  10. Controversial – The sensationalism of the shows is a turn-off to many in the childcare industry. There is a lot more peace and harmony in most households than you will ever see portrayed on a “reality” show.

If “reality” programming is something you find entertaining (I have to admit I usually do…), then by all means watch it. Just don’t be fooled into thinking it’s 100% real.  The biggest advantage of SuperNanny is the understanding that help is available if and when you need it and that you can and should feel comfortable turning to a professional nanny for assistance with your family (just don’t expect them to show up wearing a cape and trying to immediately save the day).

Top Reasons Your Nanny Needs to Be Certified in CPR

Thursday, September 29th, 2011

When considering qualifications you should require of your nanny, CPR training should be one of them. CPR training for infants and children, in particular, would be preferred. Hopefully, your nanny will never have a need to make use of that training, but in the event that it is needed, you will be glad you required that certification.

  1. Cardiac conditions – Children may have cardiac conditions that have not yet been  discovered by their pediatrician. CPR certification would mean that your nanny would have the means to deal with an unexpected cardiac arrest.
  2. Near-drowning – Parents deal with this frightening accident on a much too frequent basis. If it can happen when the children are in the care of their parents, it can certainly happen when they are in the care of a nanny. CPR training will teach a nanny how to deal with these types of water related accidents.
  3. Choking – If a child chokes on a small object or a piece of food, they may need resuscitation after their airway has been cleared from the obstruction. In addition to CPR certification, a nanny should also know how to dislodge an item from the airway of an infant or child.
  4. Suffocation – At times, the creative minds of children can put their safety in danger. Plastic bags placed over heads and crawling into air tight spaces have caused suffocation in children, which required CPR to resuscitate them.
  5. Electrical shock – We would hope that all your unused outlets have childproof covers, but even with these safety precautions, electrical shock can still occur. Electrical shock can cause cardiac arrest. CPR certification will prepare your nanny for dealing with such a tragic event.
  6. Other accidents – Any type of accident which causes a child to stop breathing and/or their heart to stop pumping will require CPR to be administered to your child immediately. Anyone who is caring for children should be trained in how to properly administer CPR in these situations.
  7. Allergic reactions – Extreme allergic reactions can sometimes require resuscitation with CPR. Allergic reactions can be caused by bee stings, insect bites or food allergies.
  8. Stroke – Although, strokes are primarily associated with the elderly, children have been known to suffer strokes as well. This is certainly a rarity, but it just one more reason why a nanny should have her CPR certification.
  9. Time factor – Whenever a person stops breathing or has a cardiac arrest, quick action is important. The sooner CPR is begun, the better the child’s chances of recovery. Emergency services may take several minutes to respond, and every one of those minutes should be filled with CPR application to the child.
  10. Certification is proof – Simply asking your nanny if she knows CPR is not sufficient. Ask for a copy of her certification and make sure that her certification is current. Training in CPR needs to be refreshed every few years to keep a person truly prepared in the case of an emergency.

Just as your nanny should be certified in CPR, parents should be also. Any situation that your nanny might encounter, you could encounter as well. Require it of your nanny, and make sure you require it of yourself as well. 

Is the California Domestic Workers Bill of Rights Good for Nannies and Families or an Example of the Nanny State?

Thursday, September 1st, 2011

In California there’s been quite a bit of talk and some hysteria over a proposed bill, The Domestic Workers Bill of Rights or California 889.   The bill essentially requires domestic workers to be paid minimum wage and time and one-half based on the same rules as other workers.  It also requires employers to give their employee a paycheck stub that reports hours worked, pay, and deductions.

The provision that’s causing some hysteria and panic amongst families is the provision that requires the employer to give the nanny a 10 minute break every 4 hours and a 30 minute break every 5 hours.  People are saying they’ll have to hire two nannies to cover the time off.  Does that really make sense?  Don’t nannies get breaks now when the child is napping or watching TV?  How is this different from a mom talking on the phone and keeping an eye on her child at the same time?  Or, mom grabbing lunch while keeping an eye on their child.  Surely, the law doesn’t intend a break where the nanny leaves the child alone.  Personally, I think this reaction has to do more with people claiming “nanny state” than reality.

The part of the bill that will cause some pain will impact mainly seniors that have caregivers and senior care agencies.  This is because of the rules requiring live-in caregivers to have 8 hours off to sleep in a 24 hour shift and rules regarding pay.  This could be painful to seniors since it could drive up the cost of caregivers.

From what I’ve heard a similar-sounding law in NY state has had little impact on how nanny employers and employees work. For those interested here’s a link to an interview our nanny Claudia and I gave to NBC Los Angeles.

Part Two How to avoid hiring the wrong nanny

Saturday, August 13th, 2011

This nanny blog post is a continuation of the prior blog post with the same name. For those that didn’t read part one, it was based on a recent incident of a nanny caught on a nanny cam dropping, kicking and hitting a baby.  Fortunately the child wasn’t physically harmed, but you can imagine the emotional trauma to this baby.

In my prior post I mentioned that a well-respected full service nanny agency is your best defense against this type of horrible incident since they truly are professionals and have many built in safeguards to assure this won’t happen.

Since a high percentage of families won’t use a full-service nanny agency because of the cost and perceived idea that they don’t add value to their hiring, what can a family do to protect themselves? First of all, don’t take yourself off the hook by saying you did a nanny background check.  I sincerely believe the nanny involved in the incident in NJ didn’t have a criminal record. Very, very few nannies do. By all means do a nanny background check just to be sure and not sorry, but don’t rely on that for your screening.

Remember, first of all nannies found on Craigslist, online nanny sites are not vetted in any way, in spite of what some of these sites may lead you to believe.  We’re all DIY sites, so be prepared to do your homework!

What is the homework?
Use a real nanny application not just the information provided by the online site.  Look for inconsistencies such as when one job began and the other ended and the reason for the job ending.  Be on the lookout, many job hunters use their friends and relatives as references, but don’t say they’re related.  Use a nanny reference check form so that you ask the right questions. Listen to your instincts, does the person feel like a salesperson to you?  If, so it may be a phony reference.

Demand that the nanny explain gaps in employment and give you prior addresses where she lived and then compare them with the SSN address report from the background check.  Get a copy of her ID, driver’s license, SS card and immigration documents if they are not native born.

I’ve saved the most important part for last.  Interview her first in a neutral place and then if you like her have her come to your home.  Be sure if both spouses live together that both are at the interview, if not have a friend sit in on the interview.

Once she’s passed all these tests, have her come back to your house and spend some time with your children to see how they respond to her.  If you’re still comfortable with her at this point, I bet you’ve made a good decision, since you were thorough and NOT RUSHED.

Just to be on the safe side use a nanny cam and drop in on her once or twice a day at different times just to see how things are going.

How to avoid hiring the wrong nanny

Sunday, August 7th, 2011

Recently a nanny was caught hitting and kicking a baby. It’s hard to understand how someone could do something like that to a child. Thank goodness the family had a nanny cam and caught it and fired her immediately.

I’m sure that many parents are thinking after reading about this incident, “Here we go again, another nanny hurting an innocent child. We can’t trust a nanny with our children.”  This event is alarming and disturbing to all of us and probably more so to those of us in the online nanny business.

Rather than going into a defense of online nanny services, I want to talk about what could be done to possibly prevent this from happening. I’m not going to address the particular circumstances of this sad event since I don’t know enough about the details to make a comment, and I certainly don’t want to say anything that could imply parents are at fault when something like this occurs, they most definitely were not.

I believe that hiring and vetting a nanny is complex, difficult tasks that whose difficulty is underestimated by many families who believe they can go by their “gut” when hiring a nanny. Of course our gut is the primary line of defense for all of us adults when making important decisions, but gut is built on experience which few families have in this arena. Are we all experts in human nature and do we all have great interviewing skills when hiring a potential caregiver to our child? Do things like time pressure to hire quickly so that mom and dad can get to work and money not impact our judgment? Of course they do. Have you have heard about Malcolm Gladwell’s rule of 10,000 hours to be an expert in an area?

It may sound strange coming from the owner of an online nanny service to say this, but the best line of defense for families hiring a nanny is using a full-service nanny agency. They have the skills and discipline to get it right. Nanny agencies have tough standards on experience and references that eliminate most candidates so families aren’t exposed to them. They know how to find phony references and they interview thousands of nannies-and as we know with experience comes expertise.

In the next installment I’ll discuss tools that families can use when hiring on their own without an agency.

Communicating with your nanny

Monday, June 13th, 2011

After over 17 years in the nanny business and 13+ years as a nanny employer I’ve come to believe that communication is the most important element in a successful nanny/family relationship. The nanny I hire has been with me started when my son was born.

Over the years we have grown to trust each other completely and that trust was built on communication. Claudia is a very smart, hard-working person who loves my son. I treat her in every way as an equal (she’s my superior in some ways!) and greatly respect her. I never treat her as an “employee”, but rather as a partner.

Because of the high regard I hold her in my son respects her and values her in the same way that I do. I believe that it reflects on me as a parent by the people I have in our lives. Danny picks up good values that he can use throughout his life from his and my relationship with Claudia.

I don’t know how many times I’ve been in social situations and the parents complain to me about the quality of the person that works for them. Often times insulting their intelligence, motivation and more. What message are they sending to their kids?

SubscriptionSiteInsiderAward

Wednesday, June 8th, 2011

We just released our newest press release touting our winning of the Webpage testing awards from SubscriptionSiteInsider.com. We’re very proud of these achievements and grateful for the wonderful companies we work with. http://www.prweb.com/releases/prwebnanny/online/prweb8540610.htm

Although this award doesn’t have to do directly with helping a nanny online find a job or a family find an online nanny agency, it’s just part of our overall efforts to be the best we can be in all areas of business. We like to think of it all as part of one large whole package and believe excellence spills over into all aspects of business and our personal lives.

A small example is this testimonial we received today from a nanny that warmed our hearts. “Your filtering is much more precise=when I type in live-in, that’s exactly what I get.  Oh, and I love the way that your contact the potential family is set up. Have many accounts like xxre.com, xxxxPair, xxNannies, but you’re the best! About time someone got it right! Was this site a woman’s idea? LOL” Thanks Margaret for the kind words of praise.